You know better than I

It's been about two years since I first thought of getting a new job. Along the way there were disappointment, moulding, pruning; when I went for interviews and couldn't get any job, there were doubts, fears, and things that consumed my confidence.

But praise God! I believe that God is guiding and leading me. I have zero idea why I am here, but I believe that His timing is perfect. I will praise God. I will praise God when I don't understand.

There were times that I felt like I was so close to giving up. And people would tell me: you should just stay here. Sometimes I fear that I might not be able to face what's going to come. I worry that I don't have what it takes.

But I refused to give in. Doesn't matter where it is, I want to have the spirit of excellence. I want to glorify God at where I am. I believe He places me at where I am for a purpose. For Your glory, God. And teach my heart to sing "I've let go the need to know why / I'll take what answers You supply / You know better than I". Indeed, God, You know better than I.

“But you, Israel, are My servant,
Jacob whom I have chosen,
The descendants of Abraham My friend.
You whom I have taken from the ends of the earth,
And called from its farthest regions,
And said to you,
‘You are My servant,
I have chosen you and have not cast you away:
Fear not, for I am with you;
Be not dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you,
Yes, I will help you,
I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’
(Isaiah 41:8-10)

You know better than I (from "Joseph King of Dreams")

I thought I did what's right

I thought I had the answers 

I thought I chose the surest road 

But that road brought me here 

So I put up a fight 

And told You how to help me 

Now just when I have given up 

The truth is coming clear 

You know better than I 

You know the way 

I've let go the need to know why 

For You know better than I 

If this has been a test 

I cannot see the reason 

But maybe knowing I don't know 

Is part of getting through 

I try to do what's best 

And faith has made it easy 

To see the best thing I can do 

Is put my trust in You 

For You know better than I 

You know the way 

I've let go the need to know why 

For You know better than I 

I saw one cloud and thought it was a sky 

I saw a bird and thought that I could follow 

But it was You who taught that bird to fly 

If I let You reach me will You teach me 

For You know better than I 

You know the way 

I've let go the need to know why 

I'll take what answers You supply 

You know better than I

I know You are in control

To You, O Lord, I lift up my soul.

O my God, I trust in You; Let me not be ashamed;

Let not my enemies triumph over me.

Indeed, let no one who waits on You be ashamed;

Let those be ashamed who deal treacherously without cause.

Show me Your ways, O Lord;

Teach me Your paths.

Lead me in Your truth and teach me,

For You are the God of my salvation;

On You I wait all the day.

Remember, O Lord,

Your tender mercies and Your lovingkindnesses,

For they are from of old.

Do not remember the sins of my youth, nor my transgressions; 

According to Your mercy remember me, 

For Your goodness’ sake, O Lord.

Good and upright is the Lord;

Therefore He teaches sinners in the way.

The humble He guides in justice,

And the humble He teaches His way.

All the paths of the Lord are mercy and truth,

To such as keep His covenant and His testimonies.

For Your name’s sake, O Lord,

Pardon my iniquity, for it is great.

Who is the man that fears the Lord?

Him shall He teach in the way He chooses.

He himself shall dwell in prosperity,

And his descendants shall inherit the earth.

The secret of the Lord is with those who fear Him,

And He will show them His covenant.

My eyes are ever toward the Lord,

For He shall pluck my feet out of the net.

Turn Yourself to me, and have mercy on me,

For I am desolate and afflicted.

The troubles of my heart have enlarged;

Bring me out of my distresses!

Look on my affliction and my pain,

And forgive all my sins.

Consider my enemies, for they are many;

And they hate me with cruel hatred.

Keep my soul, and deliver me;

Let me not be ashamed, for I put my trust in You.

Let integrity and uprightness preserve me,

For I wait for You.

Redeem Israel, O God,

Out of all their troubles!

(Psalm 25, NKJV)

---

Praise the Lord my God! I believe my God will lead me and show me His plan and purpose for me ahead!

MIP 2016 and Mission Trip Reflection

Wow it's been almost a month since I last made an update.

Well I have been busy. But thank God because I believe there is fruitfulness in the midst of it all. I just came back from a mission trip and for the week before there was Mission Intensive Program. I really thank God for the things that He spoke to me through MIP and the trip. And I want to write them down before I forget them.

This season I believe God is speaking to me about His purpose, as I was led to seek my calling and the plan He has for me. The idea about glorifying God with my life and make it my sole purpose of living starts to override my own plans and dreams. I believe I am not even close to understand a small bit of it - be it the glory of God or what He will do in my life. In 1 Corinthians 2:9 it says

However, as it is written: “What no eye has seen, what no ear has heard, and what no human mind has conceived”— the things God has prepared for those who love him—

1. Obey beyond understanding - trusting in the unlimited God beyond my very limited mind

I shared with some that I feel like I am walking down a path and about to turn at the end of it, and I have ZERO idea what is ahead. So this is really a time for me to trust God when I don't see anything happening. I remembered a sermon where this speaker talked about his story when he was secretly planning a proposal for his then fiancee, and on the day itself she got mad because she thought he was going to propose but he did not (yet!) - actually he was planning to do it at the end of the day! The message was: do you believe that God (the God who loves you so so much) is working in the background for something that is good for you, even when you don't see anything ongoing? In Isaiah 55:8-9 God says

“For My thoughts are not your thoughts, 
Nor are your ways My ways,” says the Lord.
“For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
So are My ways higher than your ways,
And My thoughts than your thoughts.

And a lot of times I struggle with my mind trying to process things with my logical thoughts. So it's something I need to learn along the journey, which is to not overthink and allow God to reveal to me my heart's condition instead.

2. Let my doing be a natural overflow of my being

Being a Christian for all these years, I'd say I'm quite with certain "doing". But in serving God and people, I want my motive and intention to be pure and right before God. I want to always remember the reason I serve - which is out of love. I want to be like Mary, that among the tasks and responsibilities I still want to find time to rest at the feet of Lord Jesus to just be with Him.

3. Step out of my comfort zone

I believe God wants His children to grow. The theme this year is "the Year of Growth". But growing could be uncomfortable since there will be changes. I think throughout MIP and mission trip I was also challenged to do things out of my comfort zone and even natural willingness. Like I don't really like being in leadership role because I don't want to be the person who make the final call. Then I had chances to take up such responsibility. Then for the role I was involved in for Mission Convention, at first I wished I was in other groups. But I think I was challenged by what I said to God that wherever He sends me I will go. Anyway thank God I enjoyed the first session of group meeting. I hope that I can contribute to the team and God can use us to bring out an impactful message to people.

4. God is the Lord of the harvest

Another thing to remember which is very important is that God is in control in the midst of everything. Something the trip leader reminded us is that God loves the people much more than we do. We might not be able to catch everyone after the service to encourage them or to get to know them more (also because of limited number of us who knows the language), but God can use the seeds we have sown and He can work in miraculous way.

5. Discipline

If we could have so many things in a day, and still were able to make time for devotion, I think in daily life there is no reason for me to say "I have no time". It's really about discipline, and how I manage my time. Sometimes there are things that are not essential. So I need to learn to prioritize things.

Back to Singapore and routines, I think the challenge is to continue to apply what I have learned in MIP and mission trip. I thank God for the opportunity to partner with Him and to be used by Him. I pray that I will allow God to stretch me so that I can serve Him and glorify Him. It's not going to be easy, but I want that deeper work in my life. Praise God! :)

Highest Calling

I have been thinking about job changing for more than a year. It started at the end of 2014 I think. Then it evolved into an idea of finding my "calling".

Being a Christian, I had this idea that the "calling" has something to do with my career. Something specific at somewhere (specific too). Like do I continue to code? Or am I moving towards another occupation? Maybe full time ministry? Also being a software developer, I want my skills to be directly put to use in good ways.

I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. (Phil 3:14)

And during this period of time I looked into devotion materials and what people say about finding purpose and calling. I was expecting to find some guides for me to find what I am good in doing and find my specialty and so on "calling". Thank God that through the journey I discovered and started to embrace the idea that my highest calling is to follow Christ Jesus, and my highest purpose is to glorify God.

It means, whether I work at a small cubicle, or as a mother who nurse three children, or as a NBA star (I am not, but Stephen Curry is!), I am to glorify God at where I am. That means I need to work unto the Lord (Col 3:23) and be a testimony of Him (Matt 5:16).

Well I am still looking for jobs. In this time of waiting, I learn to depend on God (and still learning!). I learn to pray more. I learn to seek Him of my future. I learn to ask God to mould me in this time of waiting. There are still a lot more to learn, but I want to give thanks to God.

I still have no idea when I'll get a new job. But I believe along this journey of waiting there are blessings and I need to set my eyes upon God. I believe in His perfect timing.

Praise God!

The Alchemist - pursuing your Personal Legend

When I read C.S. Lewis' "The Alchemist", the book really spoke to me - I think it's only when the authors pour out their hearts when they write, the words become alive and speak!

It inspires me to think about pursuing my own Personal Legend. Everyone has one. And I definitely want to run after mine. Well to each his own, everyone has different dreams and wishes and ambitions.

I used to be obsessed with seeking my "calling" in relation to my work. I thought that I need to do something important and great at work to be able to make a difference. The thing is, it doesn't really matter where am I, but if I just play my part and bloom where I'm planted, I can leave a legacy. I can help to change lives. I can lead and influence for good causes.

At my current phase of life, I am still making decisions. Sometimes there are struggles. But I don't want to give up on it.

I hope you have found your Personal Legend, and would not give up on pursuing or keeping it.

DISCIPLINE is the word of the season

I wasted my last Saturday napping. Seriously like almost the whole day. Then I managed to bring my laptop out for dinner and do some work. But well, without internet not much was done. Or my micro usb cable. But thankfully my laptop hasn't died yet. Good job.

I really need to enforce discipline this season. Life is not compartmentalized. I just feel that this procrastination thing is manifesting and I DISLIKE IT. I am taking some steps to overcome and I'm learning to plan and organize.

Everyone has something to learn, even as I am out of school, and as an adult (am I one?), I still need to learn. Life lessons are tougher but valuable.

Anyway spam some photos! Good memory.

(I really do love puns.)

This apple french toast is super yummy...

Wild Stormtroopers appear!

At Changi Airport <3

Got this from the cereal box :>

(This is so awesome, I don't need to add any more descriptions.)

Awkward & Awesome + my 2016 resolutions!

Doing some scrapbooking - pugs are super cute!!!

(That title doesn't apply to anything.)

Anyway, I'm still excited about new year. In my mind I made a lot of resolutions (yea I'm the kind of person... a resolution-ist) and I really want to see them coming true! Inspired by a friend, I made a planner thingo so I can encourage myself to be more disciplined.

Some of my goals:

1. To grow in the Word

I want to spend more time to grow in the Word of God. A Christian should root his/her faith in God's Word. It's more than attending all the services or being involved in ministries. These are important but there is more. Paul said in Romans 10:2 "For I can testify about them that they are zealous for God, but their zeal is not based on knowledge.". Also in Proverbs 19:2 "Desire without knowledge is not good — how much more will hasty feet miss the way!". I have picked up a one-year-bible plan. I used to think that the quality matters more than the quantity (it is!) but I want to try to read more of the Bible other than the daily devotion. Oh talking about daily devotion, now we can move to point #2.

2. Discipline

Aaaahhhhhhhhh! Yep, DISCIPLINE. I need to practice discipline in:
- Spiritual growth - wake up early for daily devotions, memory verses etc
- Ethical practices - like be on time for work and services and meet-ups. And be on time means 10 mins earlier!
- Personal growth - do more reading, doodling, exercising and programming!

There are actually more. Well I'm really looking forward to this year. I hope there will be breakthroughs in work and personal growth.

There's this interesting book that I borrowed from library -- "Restless: Because You Were Made for More" by Jennie Allen. Lots of things in the book were like loud BANGs in my head. This year my theme is John 3:30, "He must increase, but I must decrease". May God be exalted in my life, and all for His glory.

Praise God! I am so excited. Hope you have dreams and goals for this year too! :)

New season is coming! Be prepared

In Psalm 46:10, God says "Be still, and know that I am God;".

Recently I have a lot of worries. I feel that I have always been a worrier. I don't like having a lot of responsibilities and things piled up.

I am very stressed about my wisdom tooth, and then job searching (I don't know what to do next), and also some major work thing to be done... I wanna scream and ask God "HOW TO BE STILLLLL".

Okay no screaming. Calm down. Breathe.

After Adult's Camp I feel that I really want to prepare to step into a new season and stop struggling on the same problems. Like worrying about future, always complaining about work etc. I gotta start being who I wanna be. I feel that a lot of times I'm very obsessed with doing. God help me to guard my heart above all things. I want to be pure and acceptable in the eyes of God.

Be prepared of the new season!

Gotta take out my wisdom tooth

I'm going to take out my wisdom tooth.

Don't know when, but I am going to do that. Today I woke up in the morning and felt a tiny piece of stone-liked substance in my mouth. I spat it out. Not sure whether it's a chunk of my teeth...

The thing is I don't have time for five days mc this year!

If I don't ever post again, it's probably I die in the wisdom tooth extraction surgery.

REVAMPED PASIR RIS LIBRARY IS SUPER COOL!

Honestly.

Read this to see how cool is the new library.

IT'S GONNA BE MY NEW FAVOURITE HANGOUT PLACE. This would be good for those who stay in the east. They have corners for children to read. Cool to see that they're encouraging the reading culture in Singapore.

Books are glowing...

You should look at the photos in the link above to see how cool the new library is.

Also...

THIS IS ONE FRIGGIN SAD BOOK. SADDEST. BOOK. EVER.

I don't know if this is good for kids. Maybe parents can teach them about separation, life and death etc with this book... D:

There are other books with drawings too. That really encourages to draw. (By the way I bought a new Intuos Comic.)

Can't resist these cute DIY books

Strongly recommend Pasir Ris National Library!

"Do not be afraid, for I am with you"

CONFUSION has become a thing recently.

It's all chaos. I have so many questions. I don't know what I'm supposed to do.

I took time to fast and pray, and now it seems WORSE. It's like there are more problems and worries. But I remembered last week pastor preached about something like, when you pray and bad things happen, then it's right.

I'm telling myself it's good. I'm on the right path. And I need to take heart. Because troubles are going to make me or break me.

These few days I've been thinking about this verse "Be still and know that I am God" in Psalms 46:10. I asked God: how to be still? Teach me.

I believe in God. I believe in His sovereignty and He is looking out for me. He has my best interest at heart because I am His daughter and He loves me.

I learned a new skill; I call it "Spam the Scripture". In times of troubles, just keep remembering and meditating upon the scripture. It's the Word of God. It's His words of truth and promises to us.

I believe the God who said "I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness." (Jer 31:3) will open doors. He will provide.

"But now, this is what the Lord says —
he who created you, Jacob,
he who formed you, Israel:
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.
For I am the Lord your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;
I give Egypt for your ransom,
Cush and Seba in your stead.
Since you are precious and honored in my sight,
and because I love you,
I will give people in exchange for you,
nations in exchange for your life.
Do not be afraid, for I am with you; (Isa 43:1-5a)

This is what the Lord says—
he who made a way through the sea,
a path through the mighty waters,
who drew out the chariots and horses,
the army and reinforcements together,
and they lay there, never to rise again,
extinguished, snuffed out like a wick:
“Forget the former things;
do not dwell on the past.
See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the wilderness
and streams in the wasteland. (Isa 43:16-19)

So do not fear, for I am with you; 
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. (Isa 41:10)

For I am the Lord your God
who takes hold of your right hand and says to you,
Do not fear; I will help you.
Do not be afraid, you worm Jacob, little Israel,
do not fear, for I myself will help you,”
declares the Lord, your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel. (Isa 41:13-14)

Don't be a complainer

My LTS class this semester is "Journey of Israel". So far I'm really benefited. Well most know that the journey took 40 years but it actually just needed 40 days. Why? The Israelites kept complaining and failing the tests. Ended up most of them died in the journey.

I feel that my current situation is like that -- in the wilderness, not sure where I'm heading next. I don't even know where is my Promised Land. And it's very easy to complain and murmur. That day I was thinking about this and suddenly I felt like I was like the first generation of Israelites -- when they had no water and food they complained, even though they have went through the miracle of crossing the red sea. They complained when they had manna; They didn't obey when they had quails; They complained more when they were punished for kept complaining. I don't wanna be like them!

I kept thinking about quitting. It's not that I actually think grass would be greener for my next job. I just want to get out of this place because I feel so stagnant. I don't know what else I can do or learn. I seriously want to see some progress, I just feel like I don't know what to do. Super helpless. I fear I might not be as competent for my next job. I already feel that I'm lacking compared to the standards in the market.

There are actually a lot of things to be thankful of. I can take leave easily. Be it sick leave or even no-pay leave. The company I work with also have good benefit for staff. My boss never abuses me. I don't even need to OT. My colleagues are nice people. I think God really have blessed me with all these yet I'm still not satisfied. It's difficult to find an IT job now with criteria stated above.

I want to start a change myself but at the same time I just completely have no idea what to do. Maybe I should try out some things to reignite my passion for work.

Purple passion by Anthony Easton on flickr

Random

Congrats! I knew you could do it. And it's almost that I can see you being one of the top in your fields.

It's good to see that you don't sound bitter. I'll always pray for you.

God help us.

Goodbye meow chicken

I feel so bad I didn't get to thank you for the support you've given me for all these years. You had always been the person who believe in me no matter what. I didn't want to apologize because I believe I'm making things right. I hope one day I'll see you at a better place. And I don't know if one day I'd forget there was someone who was such an important support in my life. But if that day were to come, until then I'll remember you in prayer.

Good bye, meow chicken.

Waiting, and more waiting

A little bit of update. So my sister got her result back and she failed history again. That was a little bit of a shock to us mainly because we thought she should be able to pass this time and it'd be very troublesome for her to not pass history. Basically she couldn't take up a loan and stuff because she's considered not passing her SPM. And she couldn't graduate without it either.

Anyway, thank God because I know that He's in control. For me I feel that without that I might just think that we can do it on our own. My sister and I could support her tuition fee and all. Now we're back to learning to submit all to God. I believe it's for my sister to learn to lean on God in all these. Anyway I'm thankful.

I am still waiting. For a job. Of course it's not like I'm waiting for it to fall from the sky. I prayed and said "God I have no more leave, please don't let those people ask me to go for interview unless it's a important one, like if You want me to learn something from it". AND really no one replied. Okay actually there was one replied. They just said no. But thanks for replying to reject though because a lot of the companies have no time to reply to rejected applicants. Anyway, I'm still in the midst of looking. Colleague said he has stopped because it's September already so he's waiting for bonus. I don't really care about bonus (at this point). Or maybe if they tell me bonus is gonna be 5 months I'd be like, okay let's wait then. But if there's a good chance, I don't want to miss it.

I'm following this plan "God's Dream For Your Life" on the Bible app. I feel that being a software developer is my dream. I want to be in this field to serve God and bless people. But I need to confirm that this is a dream from God. I need to be assured that this is God's plan for me. If not I want to know what it is. I want to head to the right direction.

I know I have to wait now. I felt that I wouldn't stay in this company for long. And I'm waiting to see what's next. If I impulse quit I know I'm going to regret and suffer. So as I'm still working here I want to do my best and wait to see what's next. But I told myself, I want to open up for any possibility for God to work in my life. If He wants me to stay, I'll stay.

What's next? Can't wait to find out.

God bless my family!

Thank God! Last weekend my sister enrolled for Diploma in Early Childhood Education in a local college university and she's starting in September! I am excited for her. I really really thank God for His grace in my family, that all the siblings can further study. Now all the elder ones have graduated and are working so it's just my youngest sister now.

I also thank God for blessing us financially that we can provide for my sister. Her course is new and still waiting for PTPTN approval so she couldn't get a loan yet. I thank God that we could still provide for her even without the loan. But still hopefully she could get it. Anyway thank God for providing. I don't want to think that we have the financial power and then we'd be like leaning on our own strength. God has blessed her with the admittance and a place in hostel and I just want to thank God for everything!

That day I was chatting with my mum. In the earlier years she went through hardships and I am thankful that all the children have grown up and most are working. It's like she finally can rest and enjoy life now.

I'm just thankful. Praise God!

Dream job! Where art thou!

Just a really quick update. Firstly, my dream company rejected me.

Okay. Nope, not yet. So last week I went to another interview and it was cool. I love the job description. Seems very challenging but I did feel that I am probably not so qualified for the job judging by my work experience.

Anyway, this week is an exhausted one. I feel like I have used up my energy for that last interview. I need to pick myself up and try (applying jobs) again! Fighting!

It's a new season

Thank God for a lot of things! I have received a lot in this 50 days of fasting and prayer. There are about two more weeks left. Let's hope for more! Okay so I want to count my blessings:

1. I applied for this Software Developer position in my dream company in February. So after about four months I got a reply that they want to have a phone interview with me. I was super excited because it meant a lot to me. You see, DREAM COMPANY! But this is not a I-got-it-and-I-thank-God story (yet?). The phone interview didn't go well. So I was told that I'm not that good technically. Even though I thought the comment sounded kind of rude, I can understand where it came from, since I couldn't answer the OOD questions well. Anyway I was still offered the chance to do the technical assignment. I just thank God that through it I understand what my weaknesses are and what I need to work on to be a professional, and more than that, really good software developer. I define really good as knowing my stuff and not just depending on Google. I really need to work on the theories. I don't worry about the outcome anyway, because I know God let me went through the interview for reasons, and I do not know if I'd get into the second round, but I had my takeaway and I'm thankful. And I am not worried about my future. 

2. I have full assurance that God will lead me through this wandering and seeking of life direction. This full assurance is not head knowledge. I am like 100% convinced. I feel that something great is about to happen in my next job. I really want to make a difference, like I do not just want to work for a paycheck and clock in clock out everyday. I want to work directly for the greater good of human kind. I want to help people and I hope my job can be meaningful. I know that I don't have to be that to serve God and shine. There are a lot of Christians in the market and they are being great testimonies. So I do not know what industry God is going to send me to. But I know wherever He sends me, it will be where I bloom.

3. I always wanted to avoid making choices. So there was a call from an agent that day to confirm a job application. I said okay but I was praying "God don't let her call me back if I it was not meant for me". Like I just expect an answer to drop from the sky and tell me what's next. But sometimes it's not like that. I have to take a step of faith, and step by step I'll see what happen? There are many uncertainties, but I know that if I align myself to walk right in God, I will be on the right track and head to His plan for me. So, I am not worries, just that there are things to learn and sometimes I struggle with waiting.

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. (Jeremiah 29:11, NKJV)

So, be patient, and wait, and claim the promises of God. Sounds easy, but it's going to be difficult when it comes to reality, and I want to be prepared for whatever it is that is ahead.

And don't go too harsh on myself, that's something I learned. Sometimes people say mean things to themselves; Mean things that they would not want others to receive. I have to practice to love myself more and to forgive. Do not practice self-condemnation. Sometimes pick myself up and keep moving forward is the best thing to do.

So I was craving for Nando's one day. Everyone loves lemon and herb! Normally if  I were alone I wouldn't go to a place which requires queueing. I found out that there were few people who dined alone. It's okay to pamper yourself with good food once a while. <3

So I attended a training last week. It was about boosting EQ. There's this session that we were asked to draw something and introduce ourself with that and we could draw anything. So yep, I drew a pizza! The next picture is a drawing I made on McD paper bag when I was bored. Hey spidey.

 

It's a new season. Grab the chance and don't miss it when it comes along!

50 Day Fasting + Bloom where I'm planted

So I was with a friend and we talked about my plan of either settling down in Singapore (for now) or what. Logically I think I need to settle down at a church to be able to grow. I am thinking a lot about my future. Where would I be? What would I do? Do I further study? Am I gonna be a software developer forever? How do I use my passion to bless people and glorify God? SO MANY QUESTIONS.

But I really really want to seek God for His plan. Also because without God everything would be like so chaotic for me. I don't want to make the wrong choice either. Especially when it's about my future. I really don't want to take a wrong turn and end up in the wilderness for 40 years! D:

Then Moses said to him, “If your Presence does not go with us, do not send us up from here. (Exodus 33:15)

So last week I went to this family camp. There was a song that really touched my heart. It talks about not wanting God's blessings, but God Himself. I'm not after being rich and famous and successful (define successful) but I want to be acceptable and pleasing unto God.

God, please tell me what to do. I'm seeking directions in life. And if Your presence doesn't go with me, I don't want to go.

I want to bloom where I'm planted. Help!